Okay, maybe I took my point a little too far yesterday announcing that I will abandon this blog - which I won't.
But just to clarify the issue: The idea of leaving the blog is not something that was born yesterday, the statement was just triggered by the small but quite important debate on the design of this blog, including the short discussion between Stephen and Nosemonkey that preceded Jon's statement on my design.
So I didn't have a bad day, or week, or whatever, I just felt it was right. Maybe it's not.
In fact, I don't like the idea of becoming more "important" (even in the most minor sense of the word) - more read, more recognised, more anything - by blogging, or better: By being a blogger. And I realise that in some ways this is the case. I don't like the idea that single persons, not elected by anyone, should be able to get too much influence.
The question is when you reach this point of too much. For me the point of "too much" is reached when people want more from me because they consider I either have the interest or the duty to do something else than what I do now.
You will have noticed that there is no photo or specific private information of me on my blog. Despite some privacy concerns and some other reasons, this has also been a possibility to limit the "importance" that this blogger has. The less people know of me, the more difficult it is to raise attention by creating a story that is not based on what I write. I don't blog out of interest for myself, I blog because I am interested in others.
And altogether, I am just a simple citizen, like almost 500 million others in the EU. You somehow get used to be part of a certain elite, but I have never liked this idea.
Thinking about pimping my blog means thinking about raising my importance beyond the mere text that I write as this citizen. Trying to get higher, shining brighter and nicer.
Yet, the text is the only thing I am really interested in. It is my only real contribution as a blogger, as a blogging citizen.
So every time I realise that my presence as a blogger raises demands or unshared expections - about my person, my style - I have doubts whether I should continue becoming something I am not aiming for, and yesterday was another of these moments that brought me until the statement I made.
You may understand this, or not.
A rail postcard from Baden Baden
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